Journal Entry - a new direction

I’ve been in Berkeley for a week, having flown in approximately 166 hours ago (its Friday - I got here last Friday at 10 am). In this time there have been some very profound shifts for me and it is important that I journal these insights. The details of the experiences and encounters I’ve had with all the wonderful people are documented on my IG and FB social media pages, but I feel that this entry deserves a longer form breakdown. To start , I want to say thank you to the people who’ve impacted my journey so far. There are some amazing people in the world and sometimes I can’t believe how fortunate I am to experience the actual existence of such love, kindness, and compassion. It makes my journey and the path everso clear. In a nutshell, it is to ensure that as many other beings can experience the Universe as a benign and supportive place to the deepest, innermost wishes of our heart. That my words, thoughts, and deeds can in some way contribute to the peace, joy, and love of others. And as many as I can reach! I have come to know from my experiences that the more often we directly encounter the potential, ACTUALIZED love available in the heart of another, the more open we are to being a conduit for that love for others. Of course there are going to be those less fortunate than us and those more so - such is the nature of life itself. As this is obviously arranged as a circle, how can we keep it moving? How can we remove the blocks and inhibitions from this universal and harmonious flow? When everything around us looks fucked, and life has dumped us into a ditch and kicked dirt into our eyes, can we connect to those seeds of faith, hope, and love that give us strength to rise to our feet and be a beacon for those half-buried souls who’ve given up? We have to. We must. Why? What’s the other option?! I just don’t logically see one. Nor would I want there to be a lesser alternative than to know that I am 100% responsible for my life and those in it. That being said, the journey continues. But it changes and morphs as with everything else. Such is the nature of things! I’m seeing so clearly how much I’ve invested myself into the path of yoga and the paradoxical conundrum I face in my reality at this moment. Because I’m here in San Francisco, which is supposedly a hub of yogis who’ve been teaching for many years and sharing this ancient practice with others. And what I’m seeing is a failure to embody the practices. If this rubs me the wrong way, than with as little self-righteousness and as much integrity as I can, I’ve got to set the record straight in my own life. If I truly have faith in these practices for the overall evolution of humanity, then I’ve got to see it through fully. Where am I falling short? How can I use this evidence that I see to inspire me and uplift me instead of creating judgment or criticism in my heart? Can I establish harmony and unity with these conflicting and opposing forces and bring them into integration in the light of my own reality, until the greater reality is affected? I can, and I should. As I said earlier - what is the other option?! Due to these circumstances, I’m being forced to question a lot of things. I am definitely in the process of deconstructing a lot of how I’ve been going about my life, my practice, and my teachings. Even though it may seem like I am preaching, I am really just attempting to light the fire under my own ass so that the pot I sit in begins to boil. As well, I am being critical of the message I’m delivering. I am realizing that though the primary intention is always to deliver peace, joy, and love, sometimes the actual delivery can appear quite different. Sometimes a serious wake up call is needed - perhaps it looks like a slap in the face, a punch to the chest, a fucked up break-up, or (God forbid) a car accident or health issue. But for real though. Sometimes these things can be the necessary shove in the direction we need to take. Not only for ourselves - it’s never about just us - but for everyone else who is positively impacted by that rippling change we make in our lives. That’s not to say that the divine love which is eternally protecting our Soul is ever lost. Rather, these circumstances might be the reminder we need to know we are all fortunate to simply remain alive in a body, where we actually can affect a change in our lives and the lives of others around us. Nothing else seems as important or worthwhile a pursuit as to remember we are all in this together and yet if we wish to make the world a better place, we’ve got to start with ourselves. With these thoughts in mind, I am zooming out big time. Although I LOVE teaching yoga, and plan to continue to do it, I’ve got to start to consider expanding the reach of this practice. I’ve got to be more inclusive. I am always looking at how other things can be brought into the practice and how I can maintain its integrity as a holistic development tool and practical technology to bring us towards greater state of being. One that is more whole and connected - not one that is still judging and critiquing and excluding. That being said, I must endeavor to do the necessary work to connect these motives to others as well. I’ve got to remind those whom I practice with of the essential nature of this ancient art. That the things that we do with our body, mind, and breath are meant to connect us and not separate us. That when we come together to practice with this intention in mind, we are effectively doing the most important work that could ever be done. We are collectively working through every karma that prevents us from seeing our world as a safe and supportive place and when we do this, we are healing ourselves and our planet. If we do not, the evolutionary directive of our organism and the impulses of nature tend to keep us stuck in a scared state, where we perpetuate a message that is diluted by the fear blocking our hearts. It’s the way nature has hardwired us for survival, and it’s doing a damn good job. We’ve got to rise above the nature that is keeping us from our absolute potential, which is to love and be loved in return.  It is intentional. The more I am enthusiastic about this message, the more I embody its truth and have faith that it is working, the more those around me can actually hear the meaning and not just the words. I’m here to change the world, anything less than this is simply not big enough for the energy that moves through me. The energy that connects me to you. The energy that gives me life to experience love and joy. I have to. I must. What’s the other option?!